Today was frustrating. I really struggle with anxiety at times, and it’s 10,000 times worse at the dentist’s office. I’ve been handling my dental duties okay, until recently. My retainer needed to be replaced. I hate the process of doing a retainer mold, but I also wanted my teeth to remain straight, so I went in. I ended up going in to redo this retainer mold three times, and today because they haven’t gotten it right yet, I had to go in for a new Invisalign mold. They’ve had to do it twice in one visit the last two times. That’s 7 times of choking on gooey slime, while waiting for this mold to take. Today, I was probably too honest with the poor dental assistant, about how I felt as far as having to do this again… twice. I told her that I have to go in to my other doctor on Monday for an internal sonogram, and that I’d rather do that than this. Bleh! Hey, I was still nice. Just honest.
So while trying not to choke, and make a fool of myself, these are the things that went through my head:
Life is noisy. Have you ever noticed this? It’s a constant. I’m talking about artificial noises, manmade noises. I love the sounds strong waves make. I love the sound of trees blowing in the breeze. I love the many sounds of docked sailboats, as their parts blow in the winds. This isn’t noise for me. This is music.
Am I the only one who gets in the car, gets the music all set, clears her voice, and prepares to sing a solo concert on the way to work? Or to any other destination?
Do you ever find yourself holding your breath? I do this a lot.
What about time, and thyme? I was cooking dinner the other night, and wondered “Where did the thyme go?” Then I realized how prolific that was, as later that night I was wondering “Where did the time go?” I don’t feel like I’m as old as I am, and yet here I am.
I wonder why I sometimes hear music when there finally is silence?
Why am I considered a liberal or hippy because I don’t believe in conspiracy theories, and I want to help others? I guess I could totally live a partially hippy life. I could “little house” it on a cliff overlooking the ocean. I still like to shave, I’m not into the whole commune living thing, and I like technology, electricity, plumbing, grocery stores, and sometimes fast-food. Hmmm… I don’t know why I have to be labeled. I think I transcend labels. Ha!
I hope this goo going down the back of my throat doesn’t harden and choke me. This was the thought that almost had me giving up, but the girl insisted that I only had 20 seconds left.
I told her that if I have to do this again, they’re going to have to gas me. I’m pretty sure she hopes not to see me for this particular reason again.