Bask in your Goodness

**This is a long one…
We all know this saying, but it’s always worth another share. I have to tell you, I made a mistake yesterday of reading the comments on a news story about a new LGBT resource center in Dallas (totally built with donations, btw). So many people commenting about where their “straight resource center” is, and making hugely derogatory comments. I wanted to comment, but I didn’t.
Here is what I would have said:
Straight resource centers are your churches, your families, your political party, and wherever else you feel comfortable being who you are, which is just about anywhere. Where ever you can go, and just be who you are without people looking at you, and damning you to Hell for even existing. Your resource center is basically anywhere you go, where you can hold hands with your husband or wife, without risking your safety. Your resource center is where you can go on vacation without having to explain why you don’t need two beds, or what your relationship is to the person you are vacationing with. If you aren’t comfortable being somewhere, it’s usually not based on a homosexual person, but some other type of perceived danger. Homosexuals, trans-genders, etc have nothing to do with your comfort levels in most aspects of your lives, but you, my dear straight people, pose a hugely frightening danger to us, even with just your hate filled words and selfishness in the comments of a news story, which is still the least dangerous thing we have to worry about. Did you ever consider the fact that a resource/support center is needed due to your hate, and anger  toward another individual in the name of God? Another hardworking, tax paying, citizen of the US. One who deserves the same rights you have? The right to life, liberty, and happiness? No? We don’t need or deserve resources to protect us from you? 
Now there was one comment that I believe was totally justified. A guy wanted to know where his Veteran Resource Center was. He’s absolutely in the right for asking this question. I am aware of the VA, but I’ve heard awful things about them (things I can’t say are true or not). I know there are several veteran support groups out there who raise money for veterans,  just as there are many LGBT support groups, and support groups for other causes such as Autism (mentioned because someone with Autism wanted to know where their resource center was), but maybe these support groups should focus on raising money and building actual centers for their causes. One in each large city.
Obviously any center that focuses on support and mental healing, would need to be built on donations, because our government, no matter the political party doesn’t really feel it is their responsibility to provide resources to any organization that will aide in the mental health of its citizens. They have bigger battles to fight, divide and conquer… and they’re winning!
The LGBT center should be a huge resource/safe place for those who want to commit suicide, for those who are bullied, for those who suffer PTSD from a childhood of victimization, for those who feel alone in whatever it is they’re going through, because believe it or not, it’s NOT a choice, it’s not a trend, and it’s not a movement.
We need to support each other and the human beings we are. We need to stop letting religion and politics divide us. It doesn’t have to be that way. Kindness costs us nothing! My equality costs YOU nothing. Kindness is the one thing we can offer to each other no matter our financial status. We can all love who love, we can all attend church together, sitting side by side, we can all help our fellow human, showing kindness, and tolerance, while still holding tightly to our own religious beliefs and love of God.
My marriage has no effect on you, just as yours has no effect on me. My sexuality does not define who I am as a person, and I don’t deserve to be judged by other human beings in that manner. Just as I don’t judge you based on your ignorance and selfishness. I don’t flaunt my sexuality, or my “gayness,” but I cannot be silent when I know how your words, typed or spoken, can hurt myself and others. You though, sure do flaunt your “power of being straight,” and you use God to push your selfish agenda. You’ve got agenda driven religion and politics on your side, but I promise you, you don’t have God on your side. Withholding rights, bullying, making others feel like they are less, for simply wanting the same freedoms you have because your sins aren’t what mine are, are not things I feel in the depths of my heart, God would reward you for. Remember that each sin is equal. Your sin of judgement and hate, imbibing in liquor or pills, tattooing your body, eating bacon,  sleeping around, getting married and divorced several times, cheating on your spouse, disrespecting your parents, is just as bad as what you perceive my sin to be, YET you still have the right to do these things, and only be judged by God when the time comes.
God knows you still love Him, and isn’t judging you based on what you feel is a sin, that you aren’t personally living. When you’re asked to spread the message of Jesus, and to go out and minister to people, that does not mean go out and judge, and make people feel less than human. If you think that He is this type of God, then that’s a terrifying God to believe in, and not the way I see Him.
I was planning on ending this here but I have two questions and I would love to have them answered honestly if you feel comfortable with it…
Who feels like you were born this way? I don’t.
Who feels their childhood played a huge part in shaping your sexuality? Sexual abuse, verbal and emotional abuse, extreme bullying (or maybe the bullying just brought you to terms with who you are)? I 100% feel as if my childhood shaped my sexuality today. Sexual abuse from a very young age, growing up in a domestically abusive household (both adults participating in the physical domestic abuse to each other).
Do you know how many women have been killed by their boyfriends, husbands, or ex-husbands in just these last few months? Do you know how many children have died at the hands of their own parents in just the last few months? Do you know how many children have been sexually abused by people they know? Do you know that we have a failing foster care system. One in which the homes many of these kids are going into, are more abusive than the ones they’re being removed from? This last fact isn’t something that is just now occurring. Where is your rage when it comes to human sex trafficking?? Where is your rage when reading about the high numbers of childhood poverty. Not your problem? It WILL be.  ALL of these things will eventually be our problem, and they will touch our children in ways a “gay marriage” never will.  Where is your rage when it comes to these true crimes against humanity? Why are you not out there picketing, and petitioning, and rioting against these crimes?
I know way too many people who’ve been sexually and physically abused as children. Perhaps instead of focusing on withholding rights to people who are simply trying to live life as you do, we need to focus on fixing the disconnect that is happening across this country. Stop screwing kids’ lives up, and start coming up with ways to keep our kids safe from the real predators. This is hard though, isn’t it? Because the predators are usually not those we fear, but those we trust.
I know these words will never change the minds of the people they are directed toward, and for that I am sorry, but I felt they needed to be put out there, once again. I know others who’ve said, posted, supported similar words, and to those I am thankful. We need our numbers to rise, and the numbers of the hateful, to drop. We need to redirect our anger, and our very passionate stances to issues that are truly, and negatively impacting our society. The wolf is only as powerful as his pack.
Go forth straight people, and bask in your goodness. Bask in your sameness. Bask in your many, naturally existing resource centers. Enjoy your lives, because before you know it, something could happen that will throw you for a loop. Who knows, maybe that moment won’t come until you are truly standing at God’s pearly gates, but it will come. Until then, bask in all that you believe to be right and true, while judging in the name of God, ignoring the true atrocities that are occurring more frequently, and hurting those who don’t deserve the pain.

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40 something woman in the midst of a midlife crisis, living daily life with a smile on my face, love in my heart, and completely dripping sarcasm like melting cheese from a cheese-burger.

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